Fry: I can't drink that. The metal shavings make my throat bleed.

Zoidberg: What's going on? Is this angry yelling or busted hearing aid yelling?
Hermes: I'm afraid it's both.
Professor: What?

Bender: We're makin' beer! I'm the brewery.
Dwight: I hear alcohol makes you stupid.
Fry: No, I'm... doesn't.

Bender: I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself.

Dwight: Why do they always treat us like dumb kinds? We're practically old enough to find the Fox network infantile.

Hermes: Sweet guinea pig of Winnipeg, they've taken over our company!

Hermes: You rotten kids! Will you be hiring?
Dwight: No.
Hermes: You rotten kids!

Cubert: Hey, Leela, help me apply thes flame decals I got in my cereal.
They'll help the ship go faster.
Leela: And what's your scientific basis for thinking that?
Cubert: I'm twelve.

Bender: It feels like I'm trying to push a waterbed out of me!

Professor: Good thing I had this net installed for catching giraffes.

Dwight: Can I use the gun, dad?
Hermes: What kind of father would I be if I said "no?"

Hermes: What do we do when we break somebody's window?
Dwight: Pay for it?
Hermes: Oh, heavens no. We apologize, with nice cheap words.

Dwight: You guys almost had him... until he digested you.

Hermes: This is what makes life worth clinging to.